Sunday, September 19, 2004
Pausing for a Second
Here is an excerpt from a letter I wrote a couple days ago to a dear friend of mine. It's not so often that I take a second to reflect upon where I've gone and where I'm doing. Or, during the rare occasions when I do, I'm usually far from any computers, paper, or tape recorder to record what I was thinking. So here's a rare moment that I've managed to capture, and I'll probably be revisiting...
"I guess that the other big "change" in my life or worldview is that I see my long and (at times) very fruitful journey with environmental advocacy coming to an end. Though I still care deeply about the issues, I am no longer able to be involved in them in the same passionate capacity as I was during the Cleaner Bus campaign in Minnesota. I've climbed so high up the leadership ladder on the national level that now I spend almost all of my time on conference calls, bureaucratic committees, and boom-and-bust conferences. AsI learn more about the movement and the big environmental organizations, I also find myself unable to play by the rules of their game, or see eye to eye with them on some important issues. I had hoped that by taking on more serious leadership roles, I would be receiving dozens of e-mails from excited students across the country whom I would be able to guide and advise. Instead, I am receiving dozens of e-mails daily about (boring) conference calls, notes, plans, and other things that zap one's energy but yield little, if any, results.
My environmental work took me very far, from gracing the covers of Teen People alongside Hilary Duff, to meeting Ben Affleck, and to meeting the Democratic Presidential candidates and urging them to support clean energy. It has been exciting and impressive and has done a good job at making my head spin. However, if I am ever remembered for something, I don't want it to be for meeting Ben Affleck and shaking John Edward's hand several times. I'd want it to be for inspiring other people and helping them make a difference in their lives.
The past couple years have been a true whirlwind for me, high, low, and spinning fast. As silly as it sounds at my young age, I feel like I am now ready to hit the "game over" button and take a break. I am now working on wrapping up my responsibilities with the environmental coalitions I took part in. This semester I'm taking it (relatively) easier than in the past. I think it's time to detox from years of overstimulation. I'm very much looking forward to devoting more time to myself and to discovering more about myself than I know right now. I have no idea as to what kind of a person I will emerge once things calm down, but I am looking forward to finding that out."
If you're curious for some more perspective, venture here, here, and here.
"I guess that the other big "change" in my life or worldview is that I see my long and (at times) very fruitful journey with environmental advocacy coming to an end. Though I still care deeply about the issues, I am no longer able to be involved in them in the same passionate capacity as I was during the Cleaner Bus campaign in Minnesota. I've climbed so high up the leadership ladder on the national level that now I spend almost all of my time on conference calls, bureaucratic committees, and boom-and-bust conferences. AsI learn more about the movement and the big environmental organizations, I also find myself unable to play by the rules of their game, or see eye to eye with them on some important issues. I had hoped that by taking on more serious leadership roles, I would be receiving dozens of e-mails from excited students across the country whom I would be able to guide and advise. Instead, I am receiving dozens of e-mails daily about (boring) conference calls, notes, plans, and other things that zap one's energy but yield little, if any, results.
My environmental work took me very far, from gracing the covers of Teen People alongside Hilary Duff, to meeting Ben Affleck, and to meeting the Democratic Presidential candidates and urging them to support clean energy. It has been exciting and impressive and has done a good job at making my head spin. However, if I am ever remembered for something, I don't want it to be for meeting Ben Affleck and shaking John Edward's hand several times. I'd want it to be for inspiring other people and helping them make a difference in their lives.
The past couple years have been a true whirlwind for me, high, low, and spinning fast. As silly as it sounds at my young age, I feel like I am now ready to hit the "game over" button and take a break. I am now working on wrapping up my responsibilities with the environmental coalitions I took part in. This semester I'm taking it (relatively) easier than in the past. I think it's time to detox from years of overstimulation. I'm very much looking forward to devoting more time to myself and to discovering more about myself than I know right now. I have no idea as to what kind of a person I will emerge once things calm down, but I am looking forward to finding that out."
If you're curious for some more perspective, venture here, here, and here.
