Friday, June 18, 2004
Back to D.C.
So two weeks after my first weekend-stint in D.C. in five years, I'm already heading back! Tomorrow I'll be hopping on the same flight I took out to D.C. exactly two weeks ago. This time, though, I'll be spending the weekend with other Sierra Student Coalition (SSC) national leaders. We're going to be discussing how (in)effective our environmental work has been over the past year, and how to more forward more effectively in the future.
I'm a bit anxious about this meeting. Depending on how it goes, it could be my last SSC engagement, or just one of many more to come. I've mentioned in the past how I've been a tad restless about my role in the SSC and the environmental youth movement as a whole. So this meeting should really help me gage whether or not I should stay involved.
For me, it's a really tough call. I've invested almost two and a half years of my life into environmental work. From the age of 16 and a half I have committed myself to raising public awareness about how everyone's health is threatened by increasing air pollution, and to fighting for solutions to minimize pollution and protect everyone in the process. So for over two years, I've rolled up my sleeves and got serious. Everyday after school, I was out there petitioning, testifying at the state capitol, speaking at conferences, media events, or waking up a 5am to drive to the other side of town and speak to new student groups early in the morning so I could make it back before school started.
It was intense work, but for the first year or so it was well worth the effort. At first I really felt like I was making a difference. I saw results. People signed petitions. Students I spoke to wanted to get involved. Articles I wrote got published in local newsprint, or the newspapers and TV wrote about the campaigns I was involved in. Congress passed the law I testified in support of. It was all the epitome of hard work paying off. But after a while the momentum started to loose steam. I moved forward with plans to launch national efforts to create a strong, effective movement of youth educating the public about the consequences we all suffer from a dirty environment. In the process we'd be tearing down stereotypes about apathetic teens and showing the nation that we too care, we too want to be involved, and we too have opinions that should be valued just as much as others'.
This seemed like a great, noble plan. I loved it, and it seemed like everyone I talked to loved it. So before I knew it, I was appointed a national campaign coordinator in the SSC, and I had my work cut out for me. The only problem was that I always believed that I could never take on such a big task on my own. I didn't accomplish everything on my own on the local level. I had students and adults walking beside me every step of the way and leading the way with me. Somehow I lost most of those people in the transition from the local to the national. I'm not sure why. Maybe they had their fill, as some discontinued their environmental work. Maybe some just thought it was too much for them to take on. I don't know.
Anyway, this is where things got frustrating and the head-banging (figurative, remember? ;-)) began. It's not like I could just wake up at 5am and go meet student groups across the country and then be back in time for morning classes. Even if that were possible. I had a whopping budget of $0 to run this national campaign, and I just couldn't go out and invest thousands of dollars of my own money to make this happen. So I did my best. With some help, I created materials like information packets, brochures, petitions, flyers, tip sheets, sample letters, etc. I tried to do outreach to SSC members but the response was pretty minimal. I also wrote to Sierra Club chapters (our adult counterparts) in every state across the country encouraging them begin working with youth. I got lots of responses. There were tons of great intentions, but when push came to shove, either due to lack of funding, staffing, or interest nothing materialized.
In any case, I've spent the past year just trying to get this whole national youth energy thing off the ground. For many reasons it just hasn't been working, at all. I know I may come off as hasty and impatient, since I haven't provided all the boring details about all the ways I've tried to make this work, and all the effort I put in that seems to have been mostly in vain. I'm burning myself out, and mostly I'm not having fun anymore. I don't want to become one of those dusty people who, long ago inspired by a real passion and enthusiasm, entered an organization and took up a cause, but long after their excitement left they just stayed put and rotted. I'm not in it for the power trip, and I don't want to become one of those dry bureaucrat types.
I met with my an old junior high teacher of mine for lunch a week ago. I told him about all of my hesitations and where I might be heading (into the unknown?). He blinked and me and said, "wow, it's pretty impressive of you to admit you might not want to stay involved in something you've already committed so much of your life to." It's so hard to admit this to myself, and I'm still playing tug of war over this, and I can't quite figure out where I stand. So with all that in mind, I'm going to hold my breath and head to D.C... The last, or one of many more to come?
I'm a bit anxious about this meeting. Depending on how it goes, it could be my last SSC engagement, or just one of many more to come. I've mentioned in the past how I've been a tad restless about my role in the SSC and the environmental youth movement as a whole. So this meeting should really help me gage whether or not I should stay involved.
For me, it's a really tough call. I've invested almost two and a half years of my life into environmental work. From the age of 16 and a half I have committed myself to raising public awareness about how everyone's health is threatened by increasing air pollution, and to fighting for solutions to minimize pollution and protect everyone in the process. So for over two years, I've rolled up my sleeves and got serious. Everyday after school, I was out there petitioning, testifying at the state capitol, speaking at conferences, media events, or waking up a 5am to drive to the other side of town and speak to new student groups early in the morning so I could make it back before school started.
It was intense work, but for the first year or so it was well worth the effort. At first I really felt like I was making a difference. I saw results. People signed petitions. Students I spoke to wanted to get involved. Articles I wrote got published in local newsprint, or the newspapers and TV wrote about the campaigns I was involved in. Congress passed the law I testified in support of. It was all the epitome of hard work paying off. But after a while the momentum started to loose steam. I moved forward with plans to launch national efforts to create a strong, effective movement of youth educating the public about the consequences we all suffer from a dirty environment. In the process we'd be tearing down stereotypes about apathetic teens and showing the nation that we too care, we too want to be involved, and we too have opinions that should be valued just as much as others'.
This seemed like a great, noble plan. I loved it, and it seemed like everyone I talked to loved it. So before I knew it, I was appointed a national campaign coordinator in the SSC, and I had my work cut out for me. The only problem was that I always believed that I could never take on such a big task on my own. I didn't accomplish everything on my own on the local level. I had students and adults walking beside me every step of the way and leading the way with me. Somehow I lost most of those people in the transition from the local to the national. I'm not sure why. Maybe they had their fill, as some discontinued their environmental work. Maybe some just thought it was too much for them to take on. I don't know.
Anyway, this is where things got frustrating and the head-banging (figurative, remember? ;-)) began. It's not like I could just wake up at 5am and go meet student groups across the country and then be back in time for morning classes. Even if that were possible. I had a whopping budget of $0 to run this national campaign, and I just couldn't go out and invest thousands of dollars of my own money to make this happen. So I did my best. With some help, I created materials like information packets, brochures, petitions, flyers, tip sheets, sample letters, etc. I tried to do outreach to SSC members but the response was pretty minimal. I also wrote to Sierra Club chapters (our adult counterparts) in every state across the country encouraging them begin working with youth. I got lots of responses. There were tons of great intentions, but when push came to shove, either due to lack of funding, staffing, or interest nothing materialized.
In any case, I've spent the past year just trying to get this whole national youth energy thing off the ground. For many reasons it just hasn't been working, at all. I know I may come off as hasty and impatient, since I haven't provided all the boring details about all the ways I've tried to make this work, and all the effort I put in that seems to have been mostly in vain. I'm burning myself out, and mostly I'm not having fun anymore. I don't want to become one of those dusty people who, long ago inspired by a real passion and enthusiasm, entered an organization and took up a cause, but long after their excitement left they just stayed put and rotted. I'm not in it for the power trip, and I don't want to become one of those dry bureaucrat types.
I met with my an old junior high teacher of mine for lunch a week ago. I told him about all of my hesitations and where I might be heading (into the unknown?). He blinked and me and said, "wow, it's pretty impressive of you to admit you might not want to stay involved in something you've already committed so much of your life to." It's so hard to admit this to myself, and I'm still playing tug of war over this, and I can't quite figure out where I stand. So with all that in mind, I'm going to hold my breath and head to D.C... The last, or one of many more to come?
