Wednesday, August 17, 2005
First Look
I couldn't keep you wonderful people waiting too long. If you want a glimpse at where my life story will be continued, head on over! There's not much up yet, and I won't start posting semi-frequently until the last week of August. Nevertheless, acquaint yourself with the new place, find a cozy spot, and call your dibs on it. I hope everyone's trying to enjoy their last few weeks of summer!
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Happy Birthday & Moving On
August 13th marks the two-year birthday of this blog. I was completely oblivious about this until I surfed over to Sarah's blog a few weeks ago where she made mention of her blogger birthday, which made me wonder how this blog might be dated, too. Since we constantly soak in Time, moments like these of looking back can be a bit shocking: it's been that long?! Yes, time flies.
But time doesn't only zoom past us. It does something to us as its tides incessantly wash over us. So now as I take note of how two years blurred until this very moment I see how much I've grown and changed, and I understand where I still want to go.
Although I may not have known it then, I started this blog at one of the worst moments of my life. I was stressed and depressed beyond belief, I was a sleep deprived zombie that walked through life in a funk, and I was wondering how I could be so unhappy when I had so many amazing things going for me. For the sake of my sanity I wanted to know, no I needed to know, if there was more to life than this miserable paradox of unhappiness in the face of success and achievement.
Two years later, I smile back at that distraught teenager. I haven't grown enough to answer all of his questions, but I've gotten one step closer. Is there More to Life? Yes, I suppose, but I don't quite know what it is. In time, though, I have found more amidst the mundane because the mundane has stopped being mundane for me. Every day is a blessing because I grow, I learn, I see, and I understand more and more. I am becoming more at peace with myself, so now I can confidently say to that boy who so desperately needed to know how he needs to change to survive happily that he really didn't need to change much at all. With time he would understand.
Now I understand that it is time to move forward. More to Life was born out of a particular time and context in my life, and I'm happy to say that I'm at a better place now. This blog has been cathartic and therapeutic, and the comments you have left me have made many of my days, THANK YOU! I will keep these archives and revisit them, but I can't harp on problems and themes that don't characterize me as much anymore, and I can't let the past hold me back.
With this upcoming year being what I hope will be my last year at college I can clearly see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it's time to start worrying about what's awaiting me out there. I'm about to embark on a journey to a new life, the plans for which I will start sketching in this upcoming year. I'm wondering how I will be able to find my place in this society and this world once I break out of the college cocoon. I want to write more. I want to read more. There are books and essays to write, causes to champion, people to help, worlds to change and improve. There's the unwritten story of my existence in this big world to begin to determine.
These last few days I've been working hard at a new layout for a new blog. Thanks to all you faithful readers who have helped keep me afloat during tough times, and thanks to the many curious people who oriented their curious browsers my way for short parts of the journey. I'd be honored if you read on with me into the future. I'll keep you posted.
But time doesn't only zoom past us. It does something to us as its tides incessantly wash over us. So now as I take note of how two years blurred until this very moment I see how much I've grown and changed, and I understand where I still want to go.
Although I may not have known it then, I started this blog at one of the worst moments of my life. I was stressed and depressed beyond belief, I was a sleep deprived zombie that walked through life in a funk, and I was wondering how I could be so unhappy when I had so many amazing things going for me. For the sake of my sanity I wanted to know, no I needed to know, if there was more to life than this miserable paradox of unhappiness in the face of success and achievement.
Two years later, I smile back at that distraught teenager. I haven't grown enough to answer all of his questions, but I've gotten one step closer. Is there More to Life? Yes, I suppose, but I don't quite know what it is. In time, though, I have found more amidst the mundane because the mundane has stopped being mundane for me. Every day is a blessing because I grow, I learn, I see, and I understand more and more. I am becoming more at peace with myself, so now I can confidently say to that boy who so desperately needed to know how he needs to change to survive happily that he really didn't need to change much at all. With time he would understand.
Now I understand that it is time to move forward. More to Life was born out of a particular time and context in my life, and I'm happy to say that I'm at a better place now. This blog has been cathartic and therapeutic, and the comments you have left me have made many of my days, THANK YOU! I will keep these archives and revisit them, but I can't harp on problems and themes that don't characterize me as much anymore, and I can't let the past hold me back.
With this upcoming year being what I hope will be my last year at college I can clearly see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it's time to start worrying about what's awaiting me out there. I'm about to embark on a journey to a new life, the plans for which I will start sketching in this upcoming year. I'm wondering how I will be able to find my place in this society and this world once I break out of the college cocoon. I want to write more. I want to read more. There are books and essays to write, causes to champion, people to help, worlds to change and improve. There's the unwritten story of my existence in this big world to begin to determine.
These last few days I've been working hard at a new layout for a new blog. Thanks to all you faithful readers who have helped keep me afloat during tough times, and thanks to the many curious people who oriented their curious browsers my way for short parts of the journey. I'd be honored if you read on with me into the future. I'll keep you posted.
Thursday, August 04, 2005
August Blues
August isn't a great month for me. Since my emancipation from school in late May I've been counting down the days till I have to go back in just the opposite a prisoner counts down the days until he's released. August is the month I move back to NY and August is the month I start another semester of classes. UCK. For those of you who've been following this blog for a while, I think you know that school and I aren't on the best of terms.
So since time inevitably ticked into the month of August I've been feeling a little queasy, a little more antsy, but not altogether crushed. I've been putting up a good fight for the last two years to make this happen, so with any luck this third year will be my last year. Regardless of how luck plays out, though, I KNOW that I won't be working my ass off as much as the the last two years. Unfortunately, a broke college boy still needs to work two jobs but the whole five-six classes per semester thing is history. I'm going to bow out of college gracefully with four classes one semester and three the other. I'll be a different person with all the extra time on my hands and so much less stress hormones in my system! I admit, I'm almost a little bit excited about that.
I shouldn't get ahead of myself yet. I still need to figure out what classes I'll be taking this fall, and that's coming up fast!
In other awful August news: our garage and front yard are infested with MICE and their nasty droppings! Apparently they're what ate my sunflowers and terrorized a bunch of other living plants in our front yard. Hmph.
So since time inevitably ticked into the month of August I've been feeling a little queasy, a little more antsy, but not altogether crushed. I've been putting up a good fight for the last two years to make this happen, so with any luck this third year will be my last year. Regardless of how luck plays out, though, I KNOW that I won't be working my ass off as much as the the last two years. Unfortunately, a broke college boy still needs to work two jobs but the whole five-six classes per semester thing is history. I'm going to bow out of college gracefully with four classes one semester and three the other. I'll be a different person with all the extra time on my hands and so much less stress hormones in my system! I admit, I'm almost a little bit excited about that.
I shouldn't get ahead of myself yet. I still need to figure out what classes I'll be taking this fall, and that's coming up fast!
In other awful August news: our garage and front yard are infested with MICE and their nasty droppings! Apparently they're what ate my sunflowers and terrorized a bunch of other living plants in our front yard. Hmph.
